Sunday, March 13, 2011

Creating Another Bandwagon: Orcs and Goblins

From the post on Grognardia:

Goblins and their larger cousins the Orcs are a blight of unknown origin. They pay no heed to the worshippers of the gods, the spirits of nature or the demonic legions of hell. They just are.

Goblins are highly intelligent sentient beings, about half the size of a man. They are a nimble folk, covered with tough leathery green skin and a hearty constitution. Their meat is foul and inedible to all but other goblinoids, though they themselves can eat most anything the race of man can consume. Goblins have both male and female genders, though they have no distinguishing secondary sexual characteristics. A goblin female will lay a clutch of 1 to 3 eggs every season. The eggs will hatch by the next season, and the goblins will often grow up feral, maturing fully in a year and a half. Goblins bands will often round up small goblins and rope them into slave labour. A goblin will rarely live past 10 years of age, to cope their brains learn far faster than other races, often able to learn in a week what other races may take a full semester of study to learn.

Goblins however have no soul and thus sense of empathy, each one is a sociopath. Every action is taken solely with the best interests of the individual in mind. While would could train a goblin to be a nanny to ones children, it would not be wise. For the goblin may continue to properly raise and nanny the children should it be in its best long term interests, the first second a better opportunity came around the goblin would feel no ill will towards eating the children alive. The goblin would be puzzled that it should feel bad. This lack of soul likewise makes goblins immune to possession from spirits or demons, and worthless as worshippers. The fact that death spells oblivion makes goblins very cowardly.


Orcs are very similar to goblins, save they are bigger, averaging 6'6 in heigh and a solid 230lbs in a very muscular build. Orcs are fairly dim however, this actually leads into their great strength over goblins. While they also lack empathy and souls, orcs are not smart enough to truly grasp the concept of death. They do not grasp that they can die and in doing so cease to exist. Orcs are thus far more warlike, their short and impatient tempers frequently lead to their simple desire to take what they want and do what they want whenever they want. Orc females will go into heat and lay a single egg twice a year. The egg will hatch within 3 months and be mature within a year.


Orcs and goblins are thus dangerous pests, occasionally bribed to act as unreliable mercenaries or thugs but valued by none. Only their inability to form long term groups prevents them from being a sizable menace. Very rarely a warlord will manage to gather a large army of goblinoids and go on a warpath of violence and looting.

1 comment:

  1. Just wanted to let you know: I brought that "wish" thread here back to life. Link: http://zzarchov.blogspot.com/2009/09/balancing-wish-spell.html?showComment=1301689607559#c6970156739337773086

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